Sometimes one feels disappointed with his progress and experience in bhakti sadhana. And as a result, he loses his enthusiasm for serving Sri Hari, Guru and the Vaisnavas. What began as a devotional expression may turn into an emotional depression.
However, we can maintain our equilibrium by controlling the senses, and by sincere daily sadhana practices. Don’t allow the mind to indulge in moods of disappointment and depression.
This is ignorance, tamo-guna, inertia, non-movement and illusion. We are not helpless—our minds are within our control. Just as our minds make us feel disappointed and depressed, the same mind, RETUNED, can make us feel fulfilled and happy in Krishna consciousness.
Srila Prabhupada compared bhakti sadhana to a baby’s attempts to walk. It does not matter how many times you fall, what counts is how many times you pick yourself up!
Srila Prabhupada said, “In the beginning [of sadhana bhakti] there may be some failures. That is quite natural. Just as a child is trying to stand, he may fall down. But that does not mean he should give up. Go on! Stick to it! And a time will come when you will be perfect in Krishna consciousness.”(690101BG.LA)
One day, all of a sudden, the baby will get the power, stand up and start walking. Similarly, one day, all of a sudden, the baby in bhakti will get Krishna’s mercy, and start running joyfully in the bliss of realizing Krishna’s love.
In this regard, Srila Prabhupada said, “The devotee should patiently follow the rules and regulations of devotional service so that the day will come when he will achieve, ALL OF A SUDDEN, all the perfection of devotional service.” (NBS 5 pur.)
A devotee can maintain his enthusiasm by remembering Sri Guru and Sri Krishna’s great kindness upon him, and by cultivating feelings of gratitude toward your merciful master and the loving Lord Sri Krishna. Enthusiasm to pull on and keep serving Sri Krishna will definitely arise in our minds if we heart fully chant Krishna’s Holy Names with faith and determination.
But don’t start chanting a fixed number of daily rounds, and then soon quit because of a lack of taste. Be patient and persevere! Krishna is watching and waiting, testing each new candidate of devotion.
While we are performing sadhana bhakti, Bhagavan Sri Krishna is thinking, “Is this person really a bhakta? Are they serious about spiritual advancement? Does he/she really want to serve Me and love Me? Or are they just selfish, only concerned with their own peace, happiness and benefit?”
Every sadhaka stands for examination before God. Be patient, be steady and keep up your daily sadhanas and japa chanting. Don’t give up! Because the very day you give up, might be the day that Bhagavan Sri Krishna was going to “all of a sudden” shower His mercy upon you!
Krpa patra sadhakas ki jai!
Jai Jai Sri Radhe!